I Take It Back
New conclusion: The slow plan sucks.Disclaimer: Before you all ridicule me for being a massive hypocrite I will make an admission - I am a total girl and spent the last week rationalizing reasons why a guy doesn’t like me. It’s pathetic and this post intends to own up and take it like a real woman.
Over the last few weeks I took an informal poll amongst my girl friends. When a guy says he wants to “slow things down” what the hell does that mean?
A vast majority of my friends said it means the guy wants to spend more time getting to know someone, in other words - he wants a relationship. The minority said it is a bad sign and means he’s just not that into you.
Is the majority correct or is this just a girl-euphemism for he’s just not that into you?
As someone who enjoys the physical aspects of a relationship, to hear the words “slow down” when it doesn’t seem to go with the flow of things can be disappointing. Although I can see the benefits of actually knowing where a person likes you to put your hand instead of ruining the moment by having to ask. Clearly the latter was my stance on the subject last week. Now, I’m sure I was trying to convince myself that it was ok, when in reality - things just weren't working out.
As of late, I’ve been perplexed by Mr. ESPN, going back and forth wondering if I have completely read the signals wrong, or if I actually do have the right to seem baffled.
Admittedly, it could totally be my own pathetic single-girl-mindedness working against me. Meaning…I met someone who is good on paper, I was attracted to and really wanted to see where things could go. I was blindly optimistic and it backfired.
On the other hand, perhaps the reasoning is all in his court. Did his ex burn him? Is he seeing someone else? Maybe he's gay?! Knowing Downtown’s experience I can’t exactly cross this off the list anymore. Who knows? Anything is possible in New York.
Regardless of the mitigating circumstances, I know two things for sure:
- If a guy is truly into me, I won’t have so many damn questions
AND - Any guy (who’s normal) will want to hook up with someone he’s interested in
Therefore, it’s time to stop wasting my own time and start looking for new options.
God, I hate being a cliché!
posted by Lisa @ 4:17 PM
2 Comments:
hear hear!
not that you were wasting your time, you were just finding yourself in the context of being with someone else. reminds me of a conversation i had with a friend this morning. granted, i'm very jaded about men right now, but that's a different issue.
and you KNOW you're worth so much more than thinking a man's liking you will validate you -- but you already came to this conclusion!
Hate to say it...but my rationale is ALWAYS- "it just shouldn't be that hard."
You know what I'm saying..
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