Avenue Elle

DVR Anxiety Disorder

I’m not exactly privy to the antics of new technology obsessions, however I wouldn’t call myself behind the times by any means. I am completely up on the trends – as my job requires, but perhaps I’m just still a little to practical for my own good. Call it leftover Midwestern behavior. For example...

• I didn’t get my first iPod until just two years ago...
• I only get a new cell phone unless it’s free with my plan...
• I still have a VHS player in my apartment...
• I still have dial up internet service...
• And, no, I don’t have a DVR...

On a desirability list for the items on the above list that I don’t have, the one I’m becoming more and more desperate for is a DVR. I hear it completely revolutionizes post-work social lives – leaving the precious “prime time” hours for activites that should be considered “prime time” activities by nature.

I’ve been exploring the notion and have been almost dead set on having one until a conversation last night stopped me in my tracks. I became aware of a new and obscure condition called “DVR Anxiety Disorder” (DVRAD). Let me define for the masses…

DVRAD: An unpleasant and complex combination of emotions (including fear, apprehension and worry) caused by the disorienting situation of having to make rational time management decisions in regard to TV viewing.

NOTE: Symptoms of DVRAD may be accompanied by physical sensations such as palpitations, nausea, chest pain and/or shortness of breath.

I had absolutely no idea that having so many options on what to watch on a Saturday afternoon would be so troublesome. After all, by nature, a Saturday afternoon is supposed to be unstructured “down-time” to recover from the overly scheduled work week that is my life.

Don’t we look forward to weekends so we can get out of the house and do non-work things that we enjoy? If that is truly the point, then why on earth would I want to save up all my TV viewing to the weekend so I can become more stressed out by trying to figure out what order to watch my shows?

I am beginning to re-think this DVR thing...

I don’t want DVRAD or anything else anxiety-related. If any weekend anxiety is to ensue, it better damn well be over trying to figure out what cocktail lounge more cute boys frequent and which restaurant has the better wine list.

Down with DVRAD!

posted by Lisa @ 6:56 PM